Tuesday, June 07, 2005

"If It Has To Do With Attitude, I'll Pack Up And Get Lost"

A friend of mine and I were having a discussion a while ago, and agreed that bad things happen when you begin to take yourself too seriously. It's so true: Life is a grand and frightening adventure, and if you begin to take seriously everything that happens therein, you're heading for a Prozac prescription and hours of therapy. Laughing is a good way to keep that at bay. Irony appreciates the people who can laugh at it and consequently doesn't work them over as badly.

On that note, I'd like to offer that I very rarely do anything on purpose. I'm certainly not funny on purpose. If you ever find yourself laughing at something I've written or said, chalk it up to Pisces lining up felicitously with Pollux and Castor, or fate, or your own sanity issues. One time I was actually funny on purpose... in HIGH SCHOOL. My friend Gene gave me a high five. It was pretty awesome. (Needless to say, I have burned that memory so far into my hippocampus that I will forget my name and my aversion to math before I forget that moment.) I also can't hit on someone on purpose. I know I've hit on people before; I'm not an idiot. But while I'm flirting with a guy, the things that come out of my mouth are just as surprising to me as they are to you or the boy being hit upon. So while we're out having fun, don't ask me to go hit on someone for you because you admire my "expertise." Please, YOU'RE the funny one. I have no idea how to flirt, and I maintain that. I'm the kind of girl who looks down at her feet, sees they have shoes on them, and wonders how the heck they got on there. That's me -- I guess I'm always preoccupied with plans to save the world or take a nap or something of that sort. It's good to know I don't take life seriously enough to bother with noticing that it's going on around me, and I think it gives me an illusion of mystery or something, when really, there's nothing.

But if I did things on purpose, I can promise you I would not walk out of the house with unzipped pants.

4 Comments:

Blogger Baltazar said...

I walked out with pants unzipped a couple of times ,but never in warm weather

6:39 PM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

I have talent, I swear. And I like how this blog is a confessional to the general public of things my friends don't generally even get to hear about. Points for the people who actually read this!

10:05 AM  
Blogger Corith Malin said...

I think if you approached a guy and explained how you don't know how to hit on him, and how you're only doing this because your friend wants you to, it would be considered hitting on him. *grin*.

11:49 AM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

Yeah, great idea, and so I could look a fool. I always enjoy that one. No thanks, that would be giving the boy the upper hand, and that is NEVER a good thing to do.

9:13 AM  

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