Sunday, November 07, 2004

"A Girl That Can Handle With Care"

Life is funny. Especially mine. I'm not saying that my life is any funnier than anyone else's, but since it's my life, I can see the hilarity more clearly. Good thing I get such a kick out of everything, because it's the only way to live. And with that little introduction, allow me to revert back to a third-grader for a minute.

First place is for losers.

I like to tell myself that. Sometimes it really is true. Who can really appreciate what they have when they're winning? No, they take it for granted and probably do a lot of stupid things. Those in the second, third, fourth, or, in my case, last places take a lot more care in what they do. They worry more and push themselves harder, and in the end, the first placer is just going to get jaded and greedy. All that attention takes away from the integrity of what they are. That's my consolation, at least, because last place really isn't fun, even when I try making lists of all the fun things I get to do and congratulating myself over the lack of stress in my life. That silly first placer... hoo, boy, I wouldn't want to be in their position, is what I'm telling yourself.

Then again, I'm not certain I really am last. It's hard to feel so unnecessary, but it's even harder to feel so unnecessary but to maybe sometimes think that you aren't. But I'll never be the kind of person to be in the first place, because I'm sure not first place material. No, people like me belong in second place. Good, but not great. Almost right, but not enough of that je ne sais quoi to move it up a level.

And now I think I've gained enough stability to move out of that third-grade level. I don't think I really believe that whole "first place is for losers" thing. Hello, first place, they wouldn't be there if they weren't more awesome than I could ever be. That spot isn't for me. My job is to congratulate graciously and find some way to really mean it. I've already lost the race.

Another point I would like to make is that, while it is I who am running the race and therefore exerting my energy and my time and my talent, I am just the runner and therefore have no importance. I'm going to go and try to wrap my head around that one now.


Blogger Sam said...

Liz, you're awesome. You're a winner in my eyes, for whatever it's worth. I don't see how anyone, including yourself, could ever believe you're "last" at anything!

What does 'je ne sais quoi' mean in French? I've always wondered what it's actual meaning is in English...

9:54 PM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

Je ne sais quoi means I don't know what. And now you know.

And I agree with you, I think I'm loads of fun. Good thing I like hanging out with myself. And good thing you're cool enough to like hanging out with me too. I think we need t-shirts.

1:35 AM  
Blogger Zadowsky said...

Liz: All the guys would say she's mighty fine
But mighty fine only got you somewhere half the time
And the other half either got you cursed out, or coming up short
Yeah, now dig this, even though
You'd need a golden calculator to divide
The time it took to look inside and realize that
Real guys go for real down to Mars girls, yeah!

1:53 AM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

So... am I down to Mars or not? Because I would like to know.

3:31 AM  
Blogger Zadowsky said...

Yeah! are you down to mars, jeje, sorry if i bother you. And.. Who I am? that's no cares.
kisses & hugs

12:48 PM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

I would just like to say that very, VERY few people know why I laughed so hard at that. Thank you, Leandro. I love my life. What crazy thing will happen next, prompting me to call Rachael at 3 a.m.?

5:06 PM  
Blogger REDguy said...

I recently have come to the conclusion that wordiness is over-rated, so I'll chime in with the cheer squad by saying, "Amen." You rock!

5:39 PM  
Blogger stevo said...

If I kill the one in first, where does that put you?

6:29 PM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

I'm going to be optimistic and say I'd be the new first. What's your plan?

8:26 PM  
Blogger stevo said...

I hear that violence is the answer. But I think the plan involves drugs. Either that or alcohol. but I really think that drugs are easier and more effective. If we decide on drugs, let me know. I've got a couple guys up at school who'll get me whatever I want. We should just buy the stuff before finals week cuz they jack up the prices then.

12:39 AM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

Drugs? That's so... uncreative.

12:56 AM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

Oh, and plus, no killing. Didn't you see? I conceded.

1:17 AM  
Blogger Sam said...


1:21 AM  
Blogger Sam said...

Sorry, I don't know why I said that. Quite random.

1:21 AM  
Blogger juxtaposer said...

Because shopping carts are an essential part of every plan? I'm glad you recognize this and embrace it fully. To the rest of you: if you were more like Sam, the world would be a better place.

2:10 AM  
Blogger stevo said...

The only thing shopping carts are good for is shopping cart bowling. The only bad part about that is that John taught me that game. Oh well.

12:33 PM  
Anonymous sum bumper sticker said...

responsibility my dear fryendz iz the greatest gyft of all...and I say, to mean all...enjoy your stay

8:18 AM  

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