Mothra Attacks
I am not dead. No, I am not. But almost.
Here's what went down yesterday. There was this moth, right? It flew into the house. I called it Mothra because, hey, what else do you do with moths? And then I wondered aloud what moths eat because this moth was flying frantically around, and I was sure it was starving. (I was actually just projecting and it was I who was starving, but that's not important.) Art flippantly replied, "Clothes. And inquisitive girls." Funny, right? Hahaha, not when his flippant reply came back to haunt him (and me -- actually, mostly just me) at 6 a.m. We'd been having a really long, very good conversation, and were completely exhausted, and I think I fell asleep, maybe, probably, when all of a sudden SOMETHING! woke me up by flitting on my face, and I startled, and shook, and made a big deal out of this SOMETHING!, whatever it was.
And then I remembered it was probably that dang moth coming to eat me for asking questions. I waved my hands around, trying to find it and bat it out of my life, and once I'd figured I'd succeeded, I put my head down to calm down. And felt the thing IN MY EAR. I have no idea where it was hiding, but woah, I thought my life was over; that the moth was secretly carnivorous and would eat my brains out. I may have even said as much out loud; I'm not sure, I was beyond exhausted. (I get pretty irrational early in the morning, especially after I have conversations about how inevitably lonely I am, I think.)
But hello! I am alive, and well, and pretty stressed, and in need of a shower after spending a couple hours washing dishes and doing laundry. You should all come visit me. I even promise to shower first.
Here's what went down yesterday. There was this moth, right? It flew into the house. I called it Mothra because, hey, what else do you do with moths? And then I wondered aloud what moths eat because this moth was flying frantically around, and I was sure it was starving. (I was actually just projecting and it was I who was starving, but that's not important.) Art flippantly replied, "Clothes. And inquisitive girls." Funny, right? Hahaha, not when his flippant reply came back to haunt him (and me -- actually, mostly just me) at 6 a.m. We'd been having a really long, very good conversation, and were completely exhausted, and I think I fell asleep, maybe, probably, when all of a sudden SOMETHING! woke me up by flitting on my face, and I startled, and shook, and made a big deal out of this SOMETHING!, whatever it was.
And then I remembered it was probably that dang moth coming to eat me for asking questions. I waved my hands around, trying to find it and bat it out of my life, and once I'd figured I'd succeeded, I put my head down to calm down. And felt the thing IN MY EAR. I have no idea where it was hiding, but woah, I thought my life was over; that the moth was secretly carnivorous and would eat my brains out. I may have even said as much out loud; I'm not sure, I was beyond exhausted. (I get pretty irrational early in the morning, especially after I have conversations about how inevitably lonely I am, I think.)
But hello! I am alive, and well, and pretty stressed, and in need of a shower after spending a couple hours washing dishes and doing laundry. You should all come visit me. I even promise to shower first.
posted by juxtaposer at 10:29 PM
5 Comments:
Death by Moth. That'd look odd in your Obit, glad it didn't actually come to pass. People would think you were... well, a sweater or something.
Did little chinese girls in a clam issue the moth commands, like what happened to the original Mothra?
Cause if so, that'd be pretty cool.
I'm thinking you've got moths confused with spiders... next thing you'll be thinking they will crawl in and out of your nose while you doze infront of the TV. Or perhaps this is just a sick and twisted movie plot that we are all apart of yet never knew.
I'm thinking you've got moths confused with spiders... next thing you'll be thinking they will crawl in and out of your nose while you doze infront of the TV. Or perhaps this is just a sick and twisted movie plot that we are all apart of yet never knew.
I don't get moths confused with spiders. I don't get anything confused with spiders. Here's how I know this: I was perfectly fine sharing space with the moth until it decided to startle me awake. As for spiders, I hope all of them, everywhere, die and rot away.
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