Saturday, February 16, 2008


I singlehandedly fixed the bathroom sink today with only a teaspoon and my intellect.

And I may have deliberately phrased that so I sounded much cleverer than actually I am. Really what happened was I entered the bathroom this morning to shower, etc., and found that there was a lot of water just sort of...chillin' in the sink. Hi, water. How are you? Um. What are you doing there?

I figured one of my roommates was saving it, or experimenting on something. But selfishly I wanted to brush my teeth, so I pushed down on the stopper release to send the splashy-splashy splashing down the throat of the sink. And pushed down again. And then pulled up? And then down again. And tried to make it go perhaps farther down. And then puzzled.

Once I'd decided that the accumulated water was NOT a science experiment (sad), but rather that someone had wanted to, I have no idea, and something went awry, and now there was all this WET gathered about that wouldn't just LEAVE, I figured I'd better fix it.

So I reached my hand in, grabbed at the stopper, and tried to pry it up. My fingers, alas, are human, and thus too fat for that purpose (curse these human genes), I looked about for a spoon. In the bathroom? I know, I know. Didn't actually think I'd be successful, but went about it anyway. And then, success. I was surprised for all of point three seconds, then shrugged, blessed a nameless, crazy roommate for doing who knows what, and pried that dang stopper up.

Blurb, blurble, blurb came the air pockets, then a little further, and it all started to spin about and chug away down the drain.



Thursday, February 14, 2008

Lost on Valentine's Day

I'm not really the kind of girl who gets really into Valentine's Day. Or who really pays attention to it at all, really. I have an entire world to save! Who can care about cards and sappy, ill-felt, ill-expressed, superficial sentiments anyway.

But then I caught the bug. I saw a roommate get really into baking for her boy thing, and a small part of my heart went, Awww. And then I found amazing valentines from that I HAD to give to my roommates. I live with four girls, there were four different valentines, it felt like heaven was solving for x for me.

So now I'm in the kitchen, mixing up pink, frothy angel food cake mix for a special Valentine's Day treat. And I have cool whip and sprinkles and frickin' RASPBERRIES. I don't even know who I am anymore.

Friday, February 08, 2008

A Sort of Stream-of-Consciousness My Parents Will Never Be Able To Follow

My printer works! Just like that, I had to reboot my computer one day, and it turned on. As if it had gotten really TIRED during the paper jam fiasco and just had to take a really long NAP. And really, how can I blame him. I can't. Printer, you are absolved. Next time, perhaps we shall take an extendo-nap together.

But this means! This means that promotional posters can return. Ha! Like they ever really will make a comeback. Our apartment is still wallpapered with the old promotional posters from a year ago; I keep meaning to make new ones. And then I wander off to do something else, like drool over computers I will never in my life be able to afford.

Or get a new roommate. Yes, the vacancy in my room has finally been filled, and it feels good. I finally realized that I just let my room get messy because before it felt so EMPTY. I had to stuff that void full of something, and what I stuffed it with was borrowed magazines, dirty clothes, and suitcases. Just sort of laying about in an entropy-approved fashion. But no longer. Now I have a reason to clean, and someone who would actually notice if I got killed on the way home from work and just never came home.

Kidding! Art and Mike would notice. Art would text my phone, wondering where I was, and then eventually assume I was being a girl and taking a very long shower. An extendo-shower. With my printer.


Tuesday, February 05, 2008

The Worst Things Ever

Off the top of my head, just a list of the ten worst things I could possibly imagine. Except not, obviously, because phone conversations is not an item on that list. (Joking.) (Not.) (Yeah, okay.)

1. Throwing up.
2. That skin on jell-o.
3. Passwords that require letters AND numbers.
4. Forgetting to bring chapstick.
5. Mint chocolate chip cookies.
6. The squeaking of lead pencils.
7. Flossing.
8. Running into a professor when you skipped his class that day.
9. Ground beef.
10. Bills.